|
[Friday
August 7th, 2009 at 11:12pm] |
|
I feel like this is all floating. I'm so tired of this. I want to go home.
|
|
| Besti-fail |
[Sunday
July 26th, 2009 at 5:16pm] |
| [ |
mood |
| |
 tired |
] |
We left home at 6am Friday morning for Bestival. Things were off to a good start until Tim put unleaded petrol in the diesel fuel car and we ended up waiting for 4 hours to have the car towed, the tank pumped etc. We arrive at the festival at about 1 and have to carry all out camping gear about a mile to where we were setting up camp, along with 15 000 other people.
I hated it.
I got on the first train back to London Saturday morning and met Robert at Waterloo Station. He stayed over last night which was nice, and we didn't have sex. We both wanted to very badly, but we held out.
I'm starting to wonder if he is what I want though. I don't know what's wrong with me right now, I started crying this morning for no reason. I'm dreading the thought of seeing the family tomorrow (Ralu mostly) and just generally stressing about things with Robert.
I'm just having an off day.
|
|
| Gomez : Little Pieces |
[Tuesday
July 14th, 2009 at 9:08pm] |
| [ |
mood |
| |
 determined |
] |
Little piece of me you can't have
and I know that it's driving you mad.
Little part inside you can't reach
I'm afraid that's the way it's gonna be
There's a part of you that wants to fight
but I never really had the appetite
|
|
| Baby it's cold outside |
[Sunday
February 1st, 2009 at 7:57pm] |
| [ |
mood |
| |
 thankful |
] |
I finally have some pictures to post! I've finally made the effort to resize and upload them all.
( Here )
|
|
| Finding my way |
[Monday
October 27th, 2008 at 11:26pm] |
I'm getting there.
Kicking myself a lot along the way.
Wondering why and what and who.
Shell thinks things will fall into place for me in England. I'm not getting my hopes up, but it'll be a step in the right direction.
Remember, love yourself. You're the only you you have.
|
|
| Welcome to the world |
[Wednesday
October 22nd, 2008 at 11:46am] |
| [ |
mood |
| |
 indescribable |
] |
Liam Christopher Reardon. 22.10.2008. Welcome to the world, gorgeous.
|
|
| Please |
[Tuesday
October 7th, 2008 at 6:15pm] |
| [ |
mood |
| |
thankful |
] |
My Dearest Darling Baby,
Please come soon and don't hurt your Mummy too much on the way out. I can't wait to meet you. To smell you and touch the downy hair on your head. Please don't do anything to hurt yourself or your Mummy on the way out.
I love you.
Aunty Catherine
|
|
| Childhood memories |
[Tuesday
July 29th, 2008 at 7:48pm] |
| [ |
mood |
| |
 relaxed |
] |
The Owl and the Pussy-cat went to sea
In a beautiful pea green boat,
They took some honey, and plenty of money,
Wrapped up in a five pound note.
The Owl looked up to the stars above,
And sang to a small guitar,
'O lovely Pussy! O Pussy my love,
What a beautiful Pussy you are,
You are,
You are!
What a beautiful Pussy you are!' Pussy said to the Owl, 'You elegant fowl!
How charmingly sweet you sing!
O let us be married! too long we have tarried:
But what shall we do for a ring?'
They sailed away, for a year and a day,
To the land where the Bong-tree grows
And there in a wood a Piggy-wig stood
With a ring at the end of his nose,
His nose,
His nose,
With a ring at the end of his nose. 'Dear pig, are you willing to sell for one shilling
Your ring?' Said the Piggy, 'I will.'
So they took it away, and were married next day
By the Turkey who lives on the hill.
They dined on mince, and slices of quince,
Which they ate with a runcible spoon;
And hand in hand, on the edge of the sand,
They danced by the light of the moon,
The moon,
The moon,
They danced by the light of the moon.
|
|
| I can't explain myself, I'm afraid, Sir, because I'm not myself you see. |
[Thursday
July 17th, 2008 at 10:03pm] |
| [ |
mood |
| |
 curious |
] |
I find myself becoming incresingly quiet. Not to say I'm not engageing in life, I just no longer have any desire to impress people. My whole soul feels quiet. I'm heading full circle, back to the place I was two months ago when I was still supposed to be leaving. It's a soft expectation. I liken it to being underwater in the surf.
Sounds are muted.
Light is diffused.
Breath is held.
I'm just waiting for the current to pick me up and rush and pull and surge around my body until I'm splayed on the sand all battered and bruised having just had the ride of my life.
I could be psyching myself up for a huge let-down but the end result is that even if I do come home after not too long I will have lifted myself out of this great big rut I seem to have currently dug myself into and I can make a new start back here.
I'm doubting that will happen.
|
|
| Ferris Bueller |
[Tuesday
July 8th, 2008 at 11:58pm] |
| [ |
mood |
| |
 amused |
] |
I do have a test today, that wasn't bullshit. It's on European socialism. I mean, really, what's the point? I'm not European. I don't plan on being European. So who cares if they're socialists? They could be fascist anarchists. It still doesn't change the fact that I don't own a car....not that I condone fascism, or any -ism for that matter. -Ism's in my opinion are not good. A person should not believe in an -ism, he should believe in himself. I quote John Lennon, "I don't believe in The Beatles, I just believe in me." Good point there. After all, he was the walrus. I could be the walrus. I'd still have to bum rides off people.
You fake a stomach cramp, and when you're bent over, moaning and wailing, you lick your palms. It's a little childish and stupid, but then, so is high school.
|
|
| Sigur Ros is love |
[Wednesday
June 18th, 2008 at 10:20pm] |
| [ |
mood |
| |
 jubilant |
] |
I have just downloaded the new Coldplay album, Viva La Vida, and I was in love with it right from the begining. Download it, beg for it, buy the CD, do whatever you have to but I believe this is by far their best. It's light and folksie and not at all moody like a lot of their previous work.
I have also downloaded a lot of Sigur Ros and I don't understand how I have made it this far in my life without them. Amazing.
|
|
| Creeping up |
[Thursday
May 8th, 2008 at 9:30pm] |
| [ |
mood |
| |
 sick |
] |
I almost feel like I'm living in-between right now. There is so much preperation and hushed excitment going on all around me that I'm just waiting for things to start coming together.
|
|
| Empty. |
[Sunday
April 20th, 2008 at 8:48pm] |
| [ |
mood |
| |
 melancholy |
] |
I feel like my heart has been ripped out of my chest.
The man who loved me before I was even created, is gone. The one man who would have seen me through it all. The one who would hoist me high on his shoulders and love me and be proud of me, is gone.
It isn't a new circumstance. I've never known a life with him in it.
Sometimes the pain is fresh and raw, like it only happened yesterday.
I feel like I can never be truely happy. Every milestone will be marred by the fact that he will never be there to witness it.
I wish there could be even a moment of relief from this agony.
|
|
| Coolest message ever |
[Wednesday
May 16th, 2007 at 8:21pm] |
| [ |
mood |
| |
amused |
] |
Hi, I'm not home right now but my shoes are, so leave them a message.
|
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